I did it without you...

'The penalties of your choices as a man cost you dearly.'

 

 

Relationships should always be equal in life, trust on both sides, loyalty and respect. It's hard to go through life trying to force a relationship, especially with a parent. This is something that shouldn't even be thought about, an unconditional bond that should never be broken, right?

Wrong.

 

Having my parents divorce was a difficult time, feeling stuck in the middle of a decision out of your control, yet so influential on your life. I didn't realise how impacting it would be him not seeing me grow up, but when you no longer see each other whether that be family or friends, this is when true reflection is shown.

Do they still make an effort with you?

From the moment my dad left our family home, I missed him so much. Yet I had no idea just how much missing him and yearning for a relationship I would never have, would impact my relationship with men and friendships so much. I thought I was the only one struggling but I now see that she must've struggled yet had to put the brave face on every day. My mum has done the best job of being both roles and couldn't be happier to have her as my best friend.

 

No matter what I done whether this was passing my GCSE's, getting a new job or passing my driving test it was my dads opinion that mattered most and getting his approval was all I wanted. Yet all along my mum was my supporter who I wouldn't of been able to succeed without. This could be due to the fact I felt I needed to live up to expectations and do something for him to be proud of, rather than him being proud for me just being me. My journey through my 19 years of life so far has been guided and influenced by my mum, I'm eternally grateful to have had my own personal cheerleader to get me through everything so far.

 

There comes a time when you will realise you are worth so much more, sometimes the best decision isn't always the easiest - that is part of life and something you have to take in your stride. When you are no longer at someone's beck and call they'll realise your worth. Just remember sometimes water is thicker than blood and you receive love from all angles.

 

Overall there are things in life we don't want to happen but yet we have to accept, things we don't want to know but we have to learn and people we cant live without but have to let go.

 

 

 

Thanks for reading guys,

Maisie :)